My greatest fear of growing older, other than dying on my toilet, is smelling like cat piss.


Bitch, Please!

side car

Do you ever cocktails during the week? Do you ever have cocktails during the week with your husband and discuss random shit?  Do you ever have cocktails and start talking about blogging with your husband? Does he listen or walk away wondering what exactly is this stupid hobby where you talk about absolutely nothing and yet, deep crap?  Do you ever have cocktails with your husband and then discuss another way to suck time out of your life because it sounds fun?  Do you ever watch reality t.v.? Do you ever have cocktails and watch reality t.v.?  Do you ever think you have the most brilliant idea during these said cocktail sessions and then when dawn’s light smacks you in your head, you realize those brilliant and fantastical ideas are just bunch stupid shit?

Yea, me neither.

Part of the cockamamie tipsy idea “from a friend who sometimes does those things above” was about making this site devoted to train wrecks.  Renaming it “Bitch, please” and in turn dissect those train wrecks you see coming at you every day. Family, carpool, reality t.v. and maybe actual train wrecks if you are into that sort of sick thing.  I mean, I seriously log in a shit-ton of hours watching stupid t.v. and talking to stupid people.  I have a ton of knowledge in this area to share with the world.

or not.

Maybe I should just stick with posting random pictures full of sarcastic one-liners.  It requires a lot less energy than actually thinking about feelings and words and stuff.


I had my hairs cut and colored last week. After realizing I forgot my umbrella, my only solution for keeping my flat-ironed and pressed hair was this:

cropped-bitch-please1.jpg showercap

Yes, I did walk around town with this on my head. I’m alright with people thinking I’ve officially lost my mind.